Katniss Everbean: Catching Crazy
by CreativeSnowman05
Summary: Has Katniss lost it? Is she insane? What has become of her and what will the Capitol's fate be when she is in a condition like this?
A/N: I wrote this for my Creative Writing class. This was written and turned in late. I wrote it all in 20 minutes. I decided to re-read this four months later. I decided to post it on here. It's stupid. It's horrible. It has no story structure whatsoever. Don't ask questions. Read.

(P.S – The girl in this story is a parody of Katniss)

I saw a golden haze of light surround the fire. The fire rose above the ground with a relentless blaze. Smoke that emerged from the flames rose higher than the fire itself, dispersing itself across the gray sky. I would have believed that the plume of smoke could have been seen from beyond the horizon. _Lemme Snapchat this._ There I was, standing before the barn I had set fire to, taking a selfie with my saxy duck lips (I'm sure my besties would loooove that). The smoke, the flames, the barn itself–all had turned into an unstoppable chaos. I expected the worst. I panicked and, realizing my only choice was to run, I staggered back, took one last look at the devastating site, turned around, and took off. I'm hungry. I ran into the woods, dashing between the trees as I leaped over scattered stones and branches. Whoops I fell on my face sorry squirrel for killing you with my face. Though I had fled from an awful situation, I felt a sense of freedom take hold of me. YOLO! No other feeling could ever replace the sensation I felt when I ran through the woods. _Oh no!_ Perhaps my freedom was due to fleeing from a problem I had caused. _Oh no!_ I suppose I was a bit selfish in that sense, but nothing could stop the problem I had created. _Oh no!_ _Oh no, no, no, no, no, nooooo! There's no Wi-Fi!_

I was foolish in thinking that I would pull this off (especially without Wi-Fi!), sneaking out of the house to meet a group of friends in the middle of the woods, in the middle of the night, so I stomped my foot in frustration and stopped to listen to some music. I turned the speakers on and put on a song.

"Turn up!" I screamed to the bear standing next to me.

I started doing the "Whip/Nae Nae, but the bear growled at my face. Dumb bear!

After I finished slapping the bear, I took out my phone and took a selfie with him. I ran after he slapped me in the head with his ratchet bear claws. As I approached the opening of the woods, I saw a few of the villagers rushing towards the woods, seeing me running from the woods, glancing at me as they drew near. _Oh no!_ Undoubtedly, they had seen the plume of smoke from the village. Now that they were there, I could not explain my actions or accuse the other girls. I felt guilt (not really). I felt guilty about the farmer's barn that I had almost burned to ashes (epic Instagram moment!). As these events occurred, I did not realize what would follow. I did not know what the town would come to be. However, it was mainly fear that gauged my thinking. Fear that the Wi-Fi would not come up until next week. It was that fear that made me think to blame the other girls for my Wi-Fi disabled-i-ness. _Wow I don't know English_. So I got out my iPad and started shopping for boots. _Ooh, a nice pair of Uggs® for only $19.99! Wait, what are Uggs? I'll Google it. Wow, they're chute! Lemme buy it with my shopping card._

I turn around and see that the entire forest spontaneously catches on fire all at once.

"Hey, you there," quivers an old man standing ten feet away from me. "You millennials are ruining this country!"  
I respond. "How dare you! I am a person of dignity and respect!" I march off into the forest and, oh yeah, it's on fire, whoops.

Turning back around, I march past the old man and whisper, "I am Generation Zeee! Bow down to meeee!"

As I head back to the village, I march into my house and slam the door. I head to my room and grab my bow and arrow. As I head back out, a hornet flies past me. Oh it was so big oops it got hit by my arrow I am so sorry. I am a bad archer. I should have stayed in school.

"Hello!" a small boy besides me says. "What's your name?"  
"Ummm, 'nobohdy', why do you want to know?" I squint my eyes at him. "Are you with the FBI?" Clearly I am not in school – I didn't learn any interrogation skills!

"No, I just wanted to know."

"Well bye."

"Bye."

"See you again never."

"Okay."

"Hey wait…"

"What?"

"Go to Mr. Bieber's store and tell him that I need ten cupcakes asap! My life depends on it! PLEASE! Oh, and get me some strawberry and chocolate cake, oh, and some cherry and apple pie with frosting. Oh, and some cinnamon walnut brownies as well."

"Okee." He skipped off into the distance, going to the store I told him to go to, at least that is where I assumed he was heading.

I continued walking and saw a dark and lonely alley _._ I walked into the alley, singing a song by The Weeknd. Suddenly, a giant animatronic teddy bear with bloody fangs sprang out from behind a nearby barrel. It screeched at me as it came out, snarling while it prepared to pounce. I screamed.

"No! I have pizza! It isn't you, it's me!" I fell on my knees and cried for mercy.

I then ran away and walked to a large hill and climbed to the top of it. I pointed my phone in the air and waited to see if I could get any signal. _Nope._ I broke down into tears, pain grasping my soul. _  
_"I just wanted to download Adele's new song," I choked.

I suddenly sit up, breathing heavily. I look around me and realize that I am in my room. I look around, hands propped against my pillow, making sure that I am truly awake. Realizing that I am, I let out a deep sigh and collapse onto my pillow. _That was the weirdest dream that I've ever had. It was so weird! But hey, at least I have something to tell to my friends. Now, where's my phone…_


End file.
